My love, my bestfriend, My mama.

I have a lot of questions/thoughts in my mind that starts with Why? but I know God has a plan why everything or things like these happened. Maybe, you already accomplished your purpose in this world that’s why God needs you to be with Him right now. Maybe, God needs someone who can cook delicious meals not just for Him but for every angel He has up there.

You and Papa are my inspiration, you gave us everything we need and want without hesitations. We saw how hardworking you both are just to make us happy and live well.

You and Papa are my relationship goals, we haven’t saw you guys fight. And if you have misunderstandings, you both make sure that everything will be okay and fixed before the day ends. I saw how you both take care at each other. Papa gave up his work just to take care of you.

You are my bestfriend, my day will not end if I haven’t talked to you or discussed some things that happened to me on that day. Kahit na minsan i think you are fed up listening to it haha. You know everything about me, my secrets, my crushes, and about this guy who almost became my first. Coz I feel like hiding something from you makes me feel upset kaya you know everything about me. Remember the time when you asked me if he already have the guts to ask you and papa. You were mad because, i told him he stopped. you keep on asking me why,  and i always answer you I dont know coz I really don’t. You are the one who knew who my friends are. And most of them are boys. Haha. (siblings/papa were shocked when most of my friends who came at your wake are guys tho). You are the only one who understands every tiny bit shits in my life Ma, ikaw lang. You support every fangirl craziness i have. You listen to the songs I like, you even memorize the lyrics of the song. I love how you sneak in to my wardrobe because you wanted to wear my The 1975 shirt. Haha

I just can’t imagine a day of me telling stories and never get a feedback from you.  To be honest, i suck at making decisions in life. I always depend on you whenever im undecided. I just can’t imagine life without you.  Paano ko malalaman kung approve sayo yung magmamahal sakin?  Lol

This is not a goodbye ma, i keep on telling papa na we should not forget you. It’s hard kasi masakit… kasi everything we see, we eat makes us remember you. We just have to learn to accept it. You’re not gone naman, we just cant see you physically.

I promise, i will take care of papa, jude and kuyas. I will accomplish every goals and dream you have for me. I will do my best just to make you and papa happy. I just wish you’ll still guide us and protect us. Guide me, whenever im undecided. Listen, whenever I tell story to the walls I have in my room. Hug me, whenever I feel upset and feel like i needed one.

I love you ma, and always will. Thank you ma.

–xx–

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